for LONELY
by karavika
Summary: "It was as every bit of peculiar—he and she was and this thing they shared." (Inspired by Aimer and Abe Mao's "for ロソリ")


_Me with my stubbornness and you who pretend to be tough  
and yet, we're blaming all the time we can't meet up_

_for LONELY_

* * *

It was as every bit of peculiar—he and she was and this _thing_ they shared.

Botan was the deity of death, the representation of grim and darkness that reaps the souls of the humans who died, uncaring and unpleasant. Death was expected to have been dressed in tall rags of dark cloth. Death was expected to be cold and gruesome. Death was expected to be silent and hollow. An empty void that pulls everything out of life, to succumb in eternal sleep, eternal refuge or eternal misery, eternal torture. Death was simply not to be a beautiful and bright flower and yet, death was dressed in the most colorful choice of wear with long, endearing azure locks and the glistening eyes of amethyst. A smile so comforting and genuine. A voice beautiful and soft that sooths even the stubborn of souls to join her into another world, to leave the world of the living and face judgment. A unsettling thought. It was terrifying—how ironic all of this. How ironic was she. Death was cheerful. Death cared and loved. Death was on beat. Death wasn't a hollow void. Death was loud and optimistic. It was a beautiful, smiling, young girl sitting on a floating oar waiting, concerned and soothing. A_ ferry girl_, as she was called. This is death, chin up and smiling genuinely as she passes by the humdrum and empty hallways of Spirit World.

* * *

It was a few painful and boring years after Yusuke went home permanently from the Demon World when Botan had the chance to see all of them again—her friends. Outside the world where she had lived the only life she's known and known almost all of the people inside the Gate of Judgment, she actually made friends, not some random souls she had acquainted herself with whenever she ferried them over to Spirit World to await their judgment. She skipped out of Koenma's office in glee and boarded her oar as she sped to the human world, ignoring Koenma's displeased pleas to return. A little break was long overdue anyway, according to Botan. She pierced through the wind, speeding throughout the sky and landing herself at Genkai's temple where she was met with Yusuke and Kazuma's bantering, Shizuru's trail of smoke, Keiko and Yukina calm disposition beside Genkai outside the temple and Kurama's silent solitude as he sat at the stairs at the wide, wooden doors of the temple.

"Hey guys!" Botan called with glee.

Kurama opened his eyes and returned Botan's smile, "Hello to you also, Botan" he greeted, his soothing voice reverberating through the woman's ears.

The brunette woman puffed out the smoke from her mouth and climbed down the few short flights of stairs to greet Botan with a smile and a hint of nicotine that Botan could strongly smell. Botan could never forget the moment when she first met Shizuru Kuwabara, her strong presence was enough to intimidate the woman and the stench of nicotine clinging on her body often resulted to further discomfort but during the course of the Dark Tournament that the Spirit Detective team unwillingly participated, she became comfortable with her presence and gained friendship with the mature and reserved brunette woman and the smell of nicotine became normal—perhaps too normal because of Genkai and recently, Yusuke—for her sense of smell that it would become surprising if she didn't smell like nicotine.

"Well Shizuru, aren't we a little early for smoking cigarettes today?"

"It's never early or late to smoke, dear" Shizuru answered, huffing another smoke from her mouth.

"Botan! You made it!" Keiko called, rushing towards the woman from the garden. Behind her were Yukina and Genkai walking in a slow and relaxed pace towards her.

"If it isn't our resident bubblegum blabbermouth" Yusuke commented, finally acknowledging Botan's presence, earning a grunt from the aforementioned woman.

Kurama already stood up from the stairs and approached the group, joining in on the conversation. After a few exchanged conversations, the group grabbed a couple of baskets sitting in the small flight of stairs and made their way down the long flight of stairs outside the temple, waving at Genkai who wished to remain behind the temple and Yusuke's little spirit beast, Puu, who decided to accompany the old woman inside the walls of her fairly huge temple. The group was a little disappointed that Genkai insisted on not joining them, but didn't choose to further relish on their disappointment and the smiles returned to their faces as they chattered. It was surprising how Genkai managed to live this long. The group guessed that her age was somewhere over 90 but she remained as strong, however, her spirit energy was declining as time passes.

Over the years after the fiasco of the first Demon World Tournament and Enki's reign, the Demon World and Spirit World have been having diplomatic talks about numerous disagreements they had over the centuries. Enma wasn't exactly proud of Koenma's decision to obstruct the Kakkai Barrier that prevented A and S class demons from entering the Living World, but he respected that decision nonetheless, considering embracing change that his son first proposed after the first Demon World Tournament, spearheaded by none other but the ex-Spirit Detective, Yusuke Urameshi. After a year of consular bilateral talks, an accord was signed between Enma, Koenma, Mukuro (which shocked Koenma, to be honest) and Enki. The accords state the new obligations of Spirit World to Demon World and the agreement to be upheld between the two worlds. The accords also state the limits the rights of demons outside of their world, an example being, the demons weren't allowed to kill and hurt humans whether they are on Demon World or in the Living World, instead—in the sub-section of the article—humans whom lost themselves inside Demon World shall be returned safely to their world. After three years, Enki came down from his position as the ruler of the Demon World and another tournament was held and the victor—who was one of the former accomplices of the late Raizen—continued where Enki left off, upholding the accords that Enki and Koenma made but the victor and new ruler made sure that retain the savagery of the demons, unlike the pacifistic persona of the retired Enki.

True to the Genkai's will, the land she had owned in the province was turned into a safe house for demons who wished to travel to the human world. However, the land was guarded by a few members of the Spirit Defense Force, in case some things will go wrong between the humans and the demons. The Living World was still made unaware of the issues circulating the three worlds, except for a few people whom cross paths with the worlds before and that was Yusuke Urameshi and his band of friends, a few human psychics recruited by the Spirit World through Genkai to protect and survey their respective areas for any unwanted demon activity and Kuroko Sato's family who was regularly updated by the old psychic. It wasn't shocking to spot a few demons in Genkai's land and some of them were even familiar faces from the Demon World Tournament or the Dark Tournament.

"It's nice, right? Seeing us all coexist greatly so far" Botan spoke up, after a comfortable silent trek throughout the woods.

"Yeah—I mean, it's still weird seeing demons in the Human World and just say 'hi' to them, even after all these years, but it's nice change" Yusuke gave out a chuckle.

"Yeah, and they don't even try their best to disguise themselves" Kazuma added, eyeing a demon from a distance, "What if a human sees them?"

"That's when the SDF comes in" Botan replied, raising a finger to make her point, "They would know if a human made contact with a demon and they will place a spell on these humans so they forget the encounter"

"Wow, Koenma did really pull his little diaper ass in this" Yusuke commented.

"Yusuke!" Botan scolded, her features etched in a scowl, "After all these years, you still can't address Lord Koenma with a least bit of respect"

Botan continued her banter about respecting Koenma and the higher ups but Yusuke shrugged it off nonchalantly, unaffected and unafraid of the consequences as he had done the same before and never once got even beat up by Koenma by it. At this time, Kurama decided to raise his arm and land his hand on Botan's shoulder, soothing her with a calm smile, "I think all your scolding will fall deaf on his ears, Botan" Kurama said, his calm demeanor affecting Botan's as well.

The azure-haired woman nodded and gave out a sigh, continuing her trek in silence, until they had encountered a beautiful, clear stream and decided to rest there for a bit. The stream was familiar to their eyes as they had passed along this sight a few times during their reunions before and a lunch picnic here once. It was a year after the first Demon World Tournament and Botan had brought her box full of pictures containing their memoirs throughout the years. It was a good laugh back then, as they relived their adventures and their past battles. Most of the pictures were from the Dark Tournament, especially after their team won and a banquet was made in their honor. Some pictures were after the Tournament when they had settled back onto their normal lives—most where Yusuke and Kazuma's banters and shenanigans out of school with a few self-shots of Keiko, Shizuru and Kurama with a gleeful Botan.

The stream glistening under the sunlight and the wind rustling calmly enough for a gentle breeze, that blew the hair of the people sitting beside the stream, was comforting. They chattered, going on about their different lives. Yusuke, not surprisingly, didn't pursue his education after high school, graduating at the age of 22, making him the oldest of his batch. Yusuke took over the Yukimura restaurant after Keiko's parents retired and business was booming. It was certainly a nice exchange for his night shift food stand that he built and worked at during his schooling. By that time, Kurama, or as he went by his human alias of Shuichi Minamino, was starting college, taking the course of Chemistry—which was surprising since everyone was surely convinced that he would take something related to Botany. Kurama is currently working as a chemistry professor in a state university and another surprising change was that his long scarlet locks were up in a ponytail, closely same with Botan's. Kazuma was already a teacher, same as Keiko. Kazuma is currently teaching Modern Literature to secondary students and Keiko was teaching Mathematics to secondary students, both working in the same school so they get to see each other more often. Shizuru was currently head of the accounting department for the company she was working for and more often, she'd scream at the phone for those clients who refuse to pay their overdue payments or try to divert the topic into tricking the company that they had already paid their accounts. It's what made Shizuru a formidable and terrifying employee of the company. Meanwhile, Yukina continued to live with Genkai at the temple, assisting her as well as a few fellow demons that roamed around the area. Her life had been quiet and happy throughout the years, however, there was still the unspoken, unfulfilled mission about her estranged brother that kept her from living the content life she had wished for a long time.

Kazuma was still determined to find that unspoken brother of Yukina however, Yusuke, Botan, Kurama and Shizuru can only smile in sympathy for both Kazuma and Yukina for different reasons. Of course, Yusuke didn't pass up the opportunity to make fun of Kazuma's determination about Yukina's long-lost brother.

"It's a shame that Hiei still hasn't told Yukina about himself" Botan whispered over to Kurama who was sat beside her, a good distance away from Yukina and Kazuma, who was currently engaging Yusuke in a conversation.

"I don't know" Kurama answered lowly, "Something tells me that Yukina already knows about Hiei's relation to her"

"How come?" Botan asked, confusion etched on her face.

"I can't explain it but there is something about Yukina's actions that tells me that she has come to a realization that Hiei might be her long-lost brother" Kurama spoke, "After all, she gave her hiruiseki stone over to Hiei, I thought that she might be telling Hiei that she knows"

Botan nodded, "Always so insightful, Kurama" she smiled.

"Speaking of the demon, is Hiei coming along with us?" Kurama asked, turning to face Botan.

The woman beside him was baffled and a stream of questions entered her head. She turned her head away from Kurama's gaze and furrowed her eyebrows. For the first time in a long while, Botan felt shocked and speechless, "Why are you asking me that?" she mustered, stammering a little, "You two are best buddies, shouldn't you the one contacting him?"

Kurama, incredulous of Botan, noticed how much she was fumbling with her hands. She refused to face his emerald gaze as she pouted and glared at the running water in front of her. He omitted a low chuckle, "Botan, you can't fool me" he said, "You and Hiei have remained in contact after the first Demon World Tournament"

"Always so insightful, Kurama" Botan grimaced.

"No, not this time" Kurama replied with a light laugh, "Hiei told me himself that you two remained in contact after the Tournament"

"Seriously? And here I am, trying to keep myself from blabbering about it because I thought that he might not like the idea of the others knowing" Botan huffed out in annoyance.

"Hey! What are you two lovebirds doing chatting amongst yourselves?" Yusuke called, waving over at Botan and Kurama, "C'mon, share it to the class, will ya?"

The red head glanced over to Botan, displaying an apologetic smile before standing up and walking over towards Yusuke and the clustered group who were currently chuckling and giggling cheekily towards the two of them. Of course, Yusuke wouldn't pass up an opportunity to tease at the two in which the woman blushed profusely and Kurama remained calm and denied the claims, claiming to seeing someone else whilst they were discussing something Spirit World-related. The lie was enough to convince a perturbed Yusuke and pouted as they took a seat on the grass between Shizuru and Kazuma. Of course, the group started to drill Kurama about this lady he was seeing and responded calmly as a long acquaintance way back in middle school that he got the opportunity to meet again in college.

"Say, Kurama, is that little shrimp coming or not?" Kazuma asked, "Hiei's been absent to these gatherings and we only get together like this once every year or two"

"Oh, since are you eager to see shorty?" Yusuke asked, eyeing Kazuma with a cheeky grin, "Are you abandoning your love for Yukina already for the—"

Before Yusuke could finish his sentence, Shizuru managed to hit Yusuke's head hard enough to fall to the ground. It was only then that Yusuke realized where his words were going and could feel the phantom voice of Hiei somewhere buried in his mind about his sister. Shizuru was muttering something, cursing Yusuke and the entire group was in laughter. Kazuma glared at Yusuke and berated him for thinking that he could abandon his love for Yukina for such an "ugly, little shrimp", which caused for Kurama, Botan and Yusuke's laughter to erupt more louder than usual. Yukina also laughed along with them, loving the humor that her companions have acquired.

It was a warm feeling to be surrounded by such caring, fun and strong people whom protected her and saved numerous times in the past and now, considering her, an ice apparition whom abandoned her home, as their friend. She was forever indebted to them. It was a huge contrast than when she lived at the glacial village back at Demon World. She hasn't thought of the village for a while and now, as she did, she was much more inclined to stay at the Living World with Genkai and with her friends. She was happier and much content to the life she has in the Living World. Her hand trailed up to her chest where her mother's hiruiseki stone once sat. It should have been empty without it residing on her chest. The last remnant of her mother gone and away from her grasp and she should be sullen and incomplete, but she felt complete instead. The hiruiseki stone was at Hiei's hands and she could never be happier, more content and firmer on her insights. It was, at first, intended to help Hiei on her favor to find her brother as its signature was identical to the other stone and possibly might find her brother on the process but after processing Hiei's words before his departure for the Demon World made her realize that Hiei was every bit of the brother that she wished to have found and after four years, when he last came into the Living World to return the stone to her, she insisted on letting him keep it, entrusting it to him, putting faith in him to tell her the truth one day.

Yukina was disappointed for a little bit that Hiei failed to show up again for this gathering. He never bothered to visit after she entrusted him the stone after attempting to return it to her, but she didn't let herself relish on the disappointment and settled for her friends that were with her at that moment.

Speaking of her friends, they were currently looking at a small metallic, rectangular item held up by Yusuke. In the monitor of the said item was their mirrored reflections, gleaming and clear. It was what the humans called a cellphone. Yukina immediately smiled towards the phone and Yusuke counted, pressing the shutter button after three counts and the picture was saved in the phone's memory.

After a few minutes, the group decided to continue their trek towards the shore and they arrived there at midday. The sun was at its peak in the sky and the blue ocean glimmered in the sunlight. The group took off their shoes and socks and left them in an abandoned, hammered canoe and headed for the sand, setting down their baskets full of food and other necessities for the little picnic. Kazuma decided to sprint ahead to the water, followed by Yusuke who pulled Keiko in the water, albeit forcefully, and thus began the water-splashing competition.

"I still hang around with children" Shizuru sighed, helping Yukina set the food above the large picnic blanket.

Yukina giggled at Shizuru's comment, "They're not so bad" she replied.

"Yeah, but they can be a real pain when they get too childish" Shizuru said, "Kazuma's pretty handful, I don't know how you put up with him and his ridiculous sonnets"

"It's silly but I find them beautiful, actually"

Kurama and Botan watched the three splash around the water from a distance, smiling at their childish endeavors. They were currently sat on the broken canoe's flank, basking in the comfortable silence that for once, Botan was more than happy to have. Things have been hectic in the Spirit World and the jumbled noises of ogres running around, Koenma's high-pitched bellows and the chatter amongst the other ferry girls was more than what Botan could handle. This was a nice exchange and she was glad she had insisted on coming along to this gathering.

"The new victor of Demon World Tournament is Yomi's son, Shura" Botan said, starting a conversation with the former demon, "And he took an oath continued to uphold the accords that Koenma and Enki had made years ago"

"I suppose I should be surprised" Kurama replied, "His father was inclined on eating humans in the past and surely that ideology passed onto the son but I guess something's changed during the first Demon World Tournament"

"I guess something has" Botan remarked, "He took over for Lady Mukuro who won last tournament three years ago and the last I heard before I left back to Spirit World after the Tournament was that Mukuro planned to retire and live a life of solitude"

"So, what does this leave Hiei?"

"He's been in charge of Lady Mukuro's territory ever since she won the tournament three years ago and he's still in charge, I guess" Botan answered, crossing her arms.

"Well, Hiei was Mukuro's second-in-command and she puts a lot of trust in Hiei's capabilities" Kurama said.

Botan nodded, unknowing of what to respond, if there is even a need to respond. The dead air around them put the ferry girl to discomfort, settling her features into a sullen look. Kurama noticed the sudden shift in atmosphere and Botan's unusual silence and stretched a sympathetic smile, "I perceive that this is bothering you?" he asked.

The woman shrugged, "Not really—I mean, I'm happy for him… in a way" Botan answered, the uncertainty evidently present, "It's certainly a nice upgrade from his past—you know, being a thief and criminal, turned second-in-command of one of the Three Kings and then, the ruler of Mukuro's former territory but I guess you can say that I'm a bit selfish to say I want to see him, but… I haven't heard from him for over three years now and I didn't get a chance to see him during the tournament"

It surprised Kurama, to say the least. It has been a while since Kurama felt truly surprised and the shock written on his face further discomforted Botan into duping her head lower. The former demon softened his features and gazed at the sullen Botan who had taken into staring at the taupe sand, playing with it with her pale feet. He suddenly remembered that night about six years ago, he was walking home from the university after work when he felt the familiar signature of demon energy walking amongst the crowd he was in. He found Hiei, amidst the crowd, expecting him with his signature poker face. Hiei's features never changed even after so many years, but his choice of clothing did. Hiei wore a dark shirt, dark slacks and black boots covered by a black, Chinese-collared coat that reached mid-thighs. His right hand was still covered in bandage with enchantments attached on it, the Jagan Eye still covered by a tight bandage around his forehead and the familiar white scarf still clung around his neck. Kurama was every bit of surprised when the fire-demon came to him, reluctantly asking for counseling about what had occurred between him and Botan—and completely under wraps, considering the ferry girl's nature to blabber. Of course, Kurama was less qualified to give love advice however, he did the best he could to understand the situation and apparently, Hiei got the words he didn't know he needed to hear before he took off that night, leaving Kurama alone at the park, still processing the words that Hiei just spewed. If there was anything certain, the former fox demon knew, that if the stoic, enigmatic, blunt and broody fire demon, that once regarded love, companionship and friendship as a weakness and senseless sentiments, needed a little counseling about his feelings for a woman—a ferry girl, to be frank—then, it was serious, _real _serious. Kurama recalled that this event was the last time he got to see the fire demon. He also remembered keeping that unplanned meeting and every bit of information he had learned that night to be a secret of his own.

When Botan brought him the news the Mukuro had won the Demon World Tournament, Kurama had become worried for the ferry girl and he could notice through her proud façade that something was bothering her, at the least and he had an intuition about it but the fox couldn't compromise the promise he had silently vowed, however, he never knew that it would go to this extent, wherein, for the next three years, Hiei never made contact with Botan, like somehow, suddenly, they were strangers.

"What happened at the last time you saw each other?" Kurama asked.

Botan raised her head and gazed at the sea, "I was congratulating him on this promotion he got, but of course, he was dismissive as ever and I guess I might've said a few things about his attitude and it erupted into an argument" she said, "I should've considered his feelings first—if he liked the new job he got, instead of bombarding him with congratulations"

"I feel like your story's not finished" Kurama chuckled.

"We'd collide on trivial matters and mostly, I'd forget most" Botan continued, chuckling to herself, "I was always pretending to be tough and he's always stubborn"

"Yeah, that's Hiei" Kurama chuckled.

"I apologized that same night, before I was made to leave by Koenma since we were bound to return to Spirit World that night and that was the last time I ever saw or heard from him"

Moments later, Shizuru began to call out to them, prompting them to eat lunch. The former fox demon noticed the strained smile that Botan immediately put up before she walked towards the picnic blanket and he followed at a calm pace, settling down between Botan and Yukina. Later, Yusuke, Kazuma and Keiko returned from the water, soaking wet and laughing aloud and settled on the blanket. Yukina began to hand out the sandwiches from the large basket and distributed it among the group. It was a quiet lunch, with not much words exchanged. The sound of the water and their chewing was all that filled their ears. However, Kurama kept noticing the strained smile that Botan had plastered on her face whilst she talked with Kazuma who was beside her. Kazuma didn't seem to notice, and Keiko, who joined the discussion, didn't seem to notice too. But, Kurama decided not to press the issue further and finished his food in silence.

The afternoon on the seashore was loud and fun, with everyone getting wet in the end, all thanks to Yusuke. The sun was already setting when they decided to return to the temple and made it there as the night sky had just settled. Genkai and Puu had greeted them inside with hot, fresh tea which they all appreciated. Yusuke offered to cook dinner, assisted by Yukina and Keiko, while the rest waited, resting around a big, warm kotatsu, watching Genkai and Kazuma battle it out on a video game.

Dinner wasn't quiet as lunch had been. Laughter filled the air, the conversation was in uproar and could've been heard from around the temple. Booze was passed around and bottles were immediately empty. Yusuke, in his drunken state, was imitating an old friend, Chuu with his mannerisms and heavy accent, while Botan, Kurama and Genkai watched his idiocrasy. Keiko was conversing with Shizuru in one corner of the kotatsu, the smell of booze and nicotine colliding together. Meanwhile, Kazuma was drunkenly singing the famous pop love song, off key and off tune for Yukina who just giggled at his performance. Everyone wished the night wouldn't end, but hours later, they were sprawled along the floor, their feet tangled under the warm kotatsu in deep sleep.

When Yusuke woke up, his head was buzzing with pain, his arms were numb and his feet were surprisingly warm. He struggled to sit up, feeling the ache in his bones and the pain in his head doubling. He was met with a great deal of mess on the table, his friends still sleeping and the disheveled floor around him and recalled the events from last night, immediately regretting his Chuu impression performance. He was also met with pills of aspirin and a pitcher of water and a few cups, sitting on the table and gladly took two pills and poured himself a nice cup of water. He got up when the pain in his head subsided and silently slipped out of the temple, finding that the sun hadn't risen yet and the cold, yet gentle, breeze of wind met his face, waking him from his stupor. He took a deep breath, taking in the fresh air that nature has to offer and jogged down the small flight of stairs and took a pleasant walk around the temple. Everything was as he remembered from the first time he was here so many years ago and he committed everything already to heart, every nick and cranny of the old woman's temple. A little later, he found his way to a small patch of garden behind the temple grounds.

Yusuke smiled at the sight. This was were he had entered a portal to Demon World and left on his three-year quest to find Raizen and learn about his demon inheritance. He remembered the brief time he was in Demon World—Raizen's territory, the numerous attempts to fight him, the bald monks who trained him, then, Yomi and Mukuro, the Demon World Tournament where he had lost the semi-finals to Yomi. Everything came back to him in a flash.

"I remember swooping down in here during Genkai's little tournament"

Yusuke turned around briskly to find Botan sitting in a tree branch, smiling down at him, "A long way down memory lane, I see" she said, before she jumped down and met the ground.

"How long have you been up there?" Yusuke asked.

"Long enough before the daylight sprung" Botan answered.

"I never thought you were a solitude type" Yusuke commented, "Much less in a tree—and I thought that was Hiei's schtick"

"Well, the height of the tree certainly gives a beautiful overview of the mountains and the forest below" Botan replied, "And it's a good place to think"

"Think about what?" Yusuke asked.

Botan didn't answer immediately and just stared at Yusuke for a moment. She began to ponder on what to answer. Her tendency to blab might creep Yusuke out and so she thought calculatingly on the extent of what she could say. This was never her style before and so she grew nervous and worried for herself and especially for Yusuke's possible reaction. It took a slap from Yusuke to get her out of her stupor and back to reality before she slapped him back for it.

"That hurt, you imbecile!" Botan exclaimed, rubbing her cheek.

"If you'd just tell me what you're thinking about!" Yusuke retorted.

"It's none of your business!" Botan replied.

"Fine! Then, tell Kurama everything and not me" Yusuke grumbled, "I'm sure you two are very close"

Botan's glare softened and etched a frown instead, "I'm sorry" she said, "You're still one of my closest friends, Yusuke and the only reason why I told Kurama my thoughts yesterday was because he knew of the situation"

"Oh yeah? Then, tell me" Yusuke replied, sitting down at the ground, "I haven't seen you for three whole years and I want to hear all the juice, so I'll try my best to understand"

Reluctantly, Botan sat down beside him and told him about how she and Hiei somehow remained in contact after the first Demon World Tournament and how that contact developed into a relationship about six years prior. Yusuke was shock, to say the least. Hiei and Botan weren't exactly the pair he had in mind—hell, he never thought that Hiei could let himself to love another person (except for his sister, of course). Botan had told the events that occurred three years prior when Mukuro won the tournament and left Hiei in charge of her territory and the argument they had. The ferry girl ended her story after admitting that she hasn't heard from Hiei for over three years and he wasn't present during the latest tournament.

"So, you and Hiei huh?" Yusuke finally spoke after a long endearing silence, "That was really a surprise, I mean—I might've laughed at it but seeing how strained you were yesterday and now, proves you're right"

Botan replied with a smile, "I guess, I was really keen on keeping this a secret"

"So, Kurama knows?"

"Hiei told him, he said" Botan replied.

Yusuke scoffed, "I can't believe shorty is following in my footsteps, leaving you alone and with no contact for three years? That's real bullshit, right there" he said, shaking his head in disapproval, "Have you ever tried going down to Demon World to find him and get some freaking answers?"

"I tried a few times but I never know where to look" Botan replied, "And things were hectic in the Spirit World, especially after the accords were signed. I was tasked to multiple jobs, after Kuroko Sato's children became the new spirit detectives, I was assigned as assistant and a lot of demons were still not compliant of the accords"

"Yeah, I remember beating a few of those back then—they wanted revenge against me for kickstarting their demise, they said" Yusuke commented.

"And the accords put a lot of new responsibilities for the Spirit World so me and a few ferry girls needed to assist Koenma on it" Botan continued, "There wasn't much time to freely stroll around Demon World to come looking for a demon who obviously doesn't want to be found"

"Even if he's a hotshot in one huge territory?"

"Everywhere I looked, he wasn't there and I wasn't meant to stay long there before Koenma berates me for taking an unscheduled break" Botan replied, "I guess it was coincidence"

"Wait, does toddler ass knows?" Yusuke asked, "He is still a toddler, right?"

Botan nodded, "Yeah, he was aware but he never opposed to it"

"Damn. Sure as hell, I would've want to see his reaction—I can imagine the Mafuken almost popping out of his mouth" Yusuke commented, laughing along with Botan, "Like how the hell did you and Hiei ended up together again?"

"Like I said, one day, we were out together here on the Human World when he just blatantly confessed" Botan said, "Our friendship was a rocky road but it was definitely worth it in the end"

"Yeah, how long did that take?" Yusuke chuckled.

"About two years of pushing and pulling before he grew comfortable around my presence and almost a whole decade before we got together" Botan laughed along, "But, I guess I was too confident in our relationship that I never anticipated this ever happening. I was always too optimistic and I was always pushy that I never stopped once to think about what he thought"

"It wasn't entirely your fault, Botan" Yusuke replied, nudging her shoulder as a friendly addition, "You were happy for him and he is just a little shit about it, that's all. I mean, you said it yourself, the bastard accepted your apology afterwards but then, left you stranded for three years—that's shit"

The sudden addition of strong spirit signature entered the area and made itself known to Botan and Yusuke. At the same time, a figure came walking in from behind, "Who left you stranded for three years, Botan?" he asked, his gruff voice echoing in the garden.

Botan and Yusuke looked at him and greeted him with a smile. Kazuma's presence lightened the mood and well welcomed by the two. The large man wasn't happy though as a scowl was etched in his features, his glare was piercing sharp and his voice sounded angry, but the two couldn't be too troubled. Kazuma always had a penchant to being the self-proclaimed 'warrior of love' and overhearing this conversation couldn't be helped but make Kazuma feel alarmed and angered.

"That sounds like some Urameshi shit all over again" he commented, earning a laugh from the conceding Yusuke.

"I want you to tell Hiei that, Kuwabara" Yusuke laughed.

"Wait—you mean, you two have been talking about Hiei?" Kazuma asked, pointing towards Botan.

"And don't be upset, Kuwabara" Yusuke said, "I only did find out about it now"

Kazuma looked at Botan expectantly and found her nodding along. Suddenly, all the color from the large man's face was gone and he stilled for a moment. Botan had to slap him before he woke up from his trance and that was when he started to scream, "What the hell?" he exclaimed, "And how long has this been going on? How the hell did that happen?"

"About how much of the conversation did you hear?" Yusuke asked.

"Not much" Kazuma answered, "When Botan got to mention something about a pushing and pulling"

Botan nodded, understanding where Kazuma was getting at. It took about another painful hour of Botan re-telling the whole story, calming down Kazuma's outburst and preventing Yusuke from laughing and teasing both Botan and Kazuma for different reasons, but in the end, Kazuma yielded into a long sigh, "You got yourself into real trouble there" he said, "I'm real sorry you have to go through that"

"It must've been really hectic there on Demon World, or in Mukuro's territory that shorty must've been too busy to try and seek you out" Yusuke replied, trying his best to console the woman beside him.

"It's fine—well, actually, thinking about it now, I have come into terms with it" Botan replied, "I find it bearable now actually, I mean, I still get pretty lonely and I'm troubled since nothing could fulfill the empty spaces between us, but yeah… bearable"

The two men knew that despite Botan's claims of it being bearable, she was still having a hard time grasping why she was left alone suddenly like that for three years. She never knew the reason why, never knew how long it will last, never knew what to do about it. It was worst than when Yusuke had to leave Keiko for three years because of troubles with his damned ancestral father, at least he had a premonition and promised to return. Kazuma landed his hand on Botan's shoulder and patted it, comforting the woman in which she appreciated kindly. Yusuke just stared out on the garden, thinking how stupid the situation was and couldn't wait to get his hands on the short man to give him a good beating.

The sun had risen up in the sky, giving a warm glow and the three figures in the garden basked in its light in silence. Later, Yukina, now dressed in a normal sundress, found them and called them in for breakfast which they gladly accepted. During their way back, Yusuke kept his eyes between Botan and Kazuma. The two men exchanged worried glances while Botan conversed with Yukina light-hearted topic, her signature gleaming smile returning to her face. They had entered inside the temple and everything was already cleaned up. Keiko, Shizuru and Kurama were already dressed in different clothes, smelling fresh out of a nice bath. The three joined in the conversation and started to eat their breakfast quietly.

After a nice bath, Yusuke and Kazuma were already changed in new clothes and met with the group outside. Botan was also looking fresh, however she was donning her signature pink kimono and her hair was tied in a tight bun (to which her friends commented positively on it), and aboard her oar already. Genkai and Yukina were out of the temple, bidding their farewells to the group and Botan took the leave first and returned to Spirit World, donning her spirit form once again.

Koenma greeted her with a calm expression at his office as he handed her the list of the names of the souls that she'll have to ferry for the new week which Botan accepted. She left the large office room and was greeted by the presence of the twins Kaisei and Fubuki, the Spirit Detectives for over the past six years. The twins were both twenty years old and started their detective duties at the same time as Yusuke and the twins' mother did at 14. They were bantering as Botan came out of the office and when the twins noticed her, they greeted her with glee, before resuming their banter. Koenma's voice was heard, calling the twins, summoning them inside the office, so did Botan's name was mentioned in the fray.

"What is it, Lord Koenma?" Fubuki asked.

"I've got a case for you" Koenma said, "And it's not your usual stolen artifact schtick, no, it's much worse"

"How worse?" Botan asked.

"Apparently, a group of humans were in the wrong place at the wrong time" Koenma started, "They got caught up in Demon World and was captured by some foolish demons who demanded the accords be nullified"

"And so? Why can't the demons on border patrol try and retrieve the humans?" Kaisei asked.

"That's another problem" Koenma replied, "The demons who have taken the human hostages are well-hidden and the border patrol are having a hard time finding them—apparently, these are some of your common D to B-class demons, they are A class demons who are capable of interchanging their demon signature—or so the head of the border patrol demons say"

"So, no one can track them?"

"I'm afraid the Spirit Detective tools won't come handy with this one" Koenma said forlornly.

"And you're sending them to demon world to chase after some unknown A-class demons?!" Botan shireked.

"It would not be the first time, Ms. Botan" Kaisei replied, recalling a distant memory.

"Yes, but at that time, they were B-class demons who tried to seize a part of human territory—this is entirely different!" Botan shrieked, "You'll be surrounded by demons of unknown power level, they might be either friendly or they'll try to hurt you—I mean, even after all these years, many demons still don't uphold the accords!"

"Ms. Botan, calm down!" Fubuki yelled, "Me and my brother have each other—we can handle it!"

Botan spared another worried look at the twins and over at Koenma who nodded at her, giving her reassurance. The older woman sighed and nodded, "Oh, alright" she huffed, finally calming down.

The door of the office opened and all the people in the room turned their attention to the incomer. The figure entered calmly and with both hands on the pockets of the coat and eyes closed. The figure that came in was a short male, donned in a black turtleneck coat that had grey outlines and reached mid-thighs with a dark violet sash tied around the waist, accentuating his lean figure and tied on the sash is a simple, black scabbard, housing a katana. Above the coat was a thick white scarf wrapped loosely around his neck. Underneath the coat were slick, black slacks and black combat boots, that tapped loudly against the tiled floor of the office. A white bandana was tied on his forehead under his raven bangs and the rest of his raven hair was shot up, defying gravity. The figure finally opened his large eyes and was met with the view of a teenaged-looking prince and three other people huddled together on the side. His red irises scanned the office and back at the prince.

"Hiei, what a pleasant surprise—what are you—?" Koenma spluttered, standing up from his large office chair before getting interrupted by the man dressed in black.

"Those demons you were looking for were the defects of my territory" he spoke, "They defected out years ago, back to when Enki was still ruling over Demon World"

Botan was beyond shock. She stared at Hiei as he walked calmly across the room and exchanged a conversation with Koenma. He only spared a second to glance at her and the two spirit detectives who were blocking a complete view of the short man. He didn't even acknowledge her one bit and it annoyed the heck out of the ferry girl. Botan felt her heart clench and then swell with different emotions—anger, frustration, longing, but mostly shock. Other than a more tasteful choice of clothes, he didn't change at all in his three-year absence—he was still broody and straightforward as ever.

"Apparently, they found the new rules too bothersome and rebelled against it for some time" Hiei continued.

"Do you have any identification whatsoever? Like a name or even a face-recognition?" Koenma asked.

"Yes, I recognize those fools" Hiei answered, "I suspected that you'd send your pawns to come to Demon World to hunt those demons but I don't like any more humans running around Demon World than what we have already and Shura wanted me to lead the investigation—so I'll handle it from here"

Hiei was about to turn away from Koenma when the prince opened his mouth to protest but Hiei beat him off to it, stopping himself to look back at the prince, "Like I said, I'll handle it from here—you'll have your humans once I get those bastards"

"At least, they better not be dead when you do" Koenma said.

Hiei left the room without a response. When the large doors closed behind the demon, Koenma and the others remained frozen in their respective places. Botan's eyes lingered on the door for a little while longer, barely registering the conversation that Kaisei and Fubuki muttered amongst themselves. Her shocked face softened but fell into a sullen one, thinking back on how Hiei barged inside the room, barely acknowledging her as if she was a stranger and telling Koenma that he'll handle the search-and-rescue mission for the lost humans. This was not how she imagined seeing him again.

Koenma just scratched his nape and sat back on his large seat with a heavy sigh.

"That was Hiei? The Hiei—Wielder of the Jagan Eye and Master of the Dragon of the Darkness Flame, Member of the former Spirit Detective Team, Hiei?" Kaisei shrieked.

"Yes" Koenma huffed, "And for your information, as much I want to leave this to Hiei and spare you kids from trouble, I can't—I mean, I trust Hiei well enough to ensure that those humans are in safe hands but even though his strength now surpasses that of an A-Class demon, I think he'll need all the help he can get"

"But you heard the creepy man—he'll take it from here" Fubuki said, "And he might not take it well that we stubbornly proceeded with this mission"

"I know, but with you two going after those humans eases me better" Koenma huffed, massaging his temple, "But I'll have to make sure about where this mission will take you, so Botan, I'm gonna need you to investigate in Demon World—Botan? Hey, Botan, are you listening to me?"

Botan finally let her sight off of the closed office doors and turned her attention towards Koenma who was near glaring at her. Her face grew bemused as she asked Koenma to repeat himself. The prince sighed, knowing well enough in what predicament his best ferry girl was in and shook his head, "No, you're not well equipped for this job" he said, "You'll just get distracted"

"Pardon me, sir, but what were you ordering me to do?" she asked.

"I was supposed to let you investigate Demon World for any developments in the search" Koenma replied, "We'll follow in on Hiei's investigations and also conduct our own to find who are involved and once we've located the demons, I'll send in the twins"

"Wouldn't that take away the 'detective' part of our jobs?" Kaisei asked.

"I know, but I can't just disobey the ruler's orders" Koenma said, "Shura made it clear that no more humans shall roam around on his realm and Hiei is made to lead the investigation, at least, if we knew where to look, I can send you two for a quick extraction and have the SDF provide a quick exit"

"And you think I'll just get distracted in the investigation?" Botan furrowed her eyebrows.

"Kaisei, Fubuki, your presence is no longer required" Koenma said, turning his head towards the twins, "I'll contact you if anything comes up"

The twins nodded and walked out of the large office doors, leaving Koenma and Botan alone. The air grew stiff and the surroundings were quiet after the echoes of the doors closed banged in the air for a moment. The ferry girl couldn't look at her boss as she felt the weight of his stern look and settled her gaze on her fumbling fingers and the sky-colored tiled floor. He was still sitting in the large chair, looking up at her expectantly but he heard no words from the ferry girl in a long time which was all new for him.

"Botan, I know you and Hiei had a past but—"

"Sir, I will not let this distract me one bit" Botan said, finding the sudden courage to say so.

Koenma huffed, "I know, I know what you're going to say but I just can't let you go to Demon World, investigating on your own and if you run into Hiei—things can go worse" he said, "It's bad enough that you had to suffer three years without knowing his condition, but what's worse is that this could jeopardize the whole mission"

The woman simple nodded, understanding the prince's concerns. In the three years of Hiei's absence from her life, Koenma had watched over her to make sure of her wellbeing. At that time, only Koenma knew of Botan and Hiei's secret relationship and he never opposed to it, even bidding them great luck on their discrete relationship. Other than a well-respected figure in Spirit World, a kind but infuriating boss, he was Botan's oldest friends, from when she first landed on Spirit World after her untimely death hundreds of years ago until now, and he always looked out for her as she did for him—like a strong sibling relationship. Between those three years, at those wallowing times, the prince always pulled her out of her quarters in a scolding fit and gave her hell of a logbook for those souls she had to ferry across the River Styx, but Botan knew it was only because wallowing in her room will simply do nothing good. She gave out a quiet sigh, sparing a glance at the prince who was still looking concerned over her and she did her best to flash a smile, "Thank you for your concern, sir"

"You know, I should've kicked Hiei's ass while he was still here" Koenma grumbled, "What he did was despicable, even for a demon. Deserting you for three years isn't worth it, Botan. What did you even see in him?"

Botan shook her head, "I don't know" she replied, lowly, "At that time, I found a whole new different side of him, and I was convinced that he was not the being everybody thinks he is, even after all those menacing glares and threats he gave me. I mean—sure, he was callous and broody, has that over-complicated honor code that I still couldn't decipher after a whole decade and he isn't the most expressive person in all three worlds, but I liked him—I really, really liked him—_loved _him"

Koenma just gave out a sigh as he watched Botan describe her love for the fire demon, "I could never understand where you're going, Botan but I'm sure it felt very real and very great that time and I'm really sorry that you had to go through all of that, you don't deserve it"

The woman flashed another wan smile towards Koenma and didn't wait for permission from him so she can leave the room and walked quietly ahead. Botan was already at the door, holding out for the large doorknobs when she heard her name be called by Koenma, "Yes, sir?" she asked, looking back at him expectantly.

"The hair's great" he said.

For the first time that day, Botan flashed a genuine, wide grin, much like her usual cheerful grins she flashes before. She muttered her gratitude before skipping out of the office. She then, heard the faint voice of Koenma calling in Jorge to tell him to fetch Ayame. She immediately headed to her quarters before slumping down on her bed and letting out an elongated sigh, the cheerful grin she had, now gone and her lips were smoothed in a straight line again.

She began to replay the events earlier in the day, when Yusuke and Kazuma talked her through with her discrete relationship with Hiei, which is not so discrete anymore since the whole former Spirit Detective knew already. It was relaxing how openly she could discuss it with Yusuke and Kazuma, though they didn't receive the news with great smiles and open arms. She recalled the breakfast she and her friends have and coming out of the shower, thinking about changing her hairdo a bit and the response she got from her friends and Koenma. Coming into Koenma's office and seeing the twins again after a month and receiving another mission, much more complicated this time and Hiei's sudden interference.

The woman wondered if Hiei managed to notice her inside the room. Though she was behind the twins during the event, her azure hair would've made a striking appearance, or her pink kimono should've done the trick. If anything else fails, her spirit energy signature should've been familiar. It broke her heart when she watched him talk to Koenma about those humans and left before she could even gather herself up and greet him like nothing happened. It felt hard seeing him so suddenly again, but she felt relieved and happy too, on the side. Hiei was alright and flashing in his new clothes. The last time she saw him, he wore almost the same clothes, only the coat and the boots were different. The last time she saw him, they were in a hotel room in Demon World, arguing about Hiei's succession to Mukuro's former territory and to hear Hiei speaking of the territory as his earlier tugged a heartstring on Botan. She definitely didn't expect it since the last time they talked involved Hiei not wanting Mukuro's territory. _I guess time does change people—even the most stubborn ones. _Botan thought.

Other than feeling relieved and happy, it seemed that all anger and frustration was thrown out the window immediately after seeing him. Botan had to admit, when Hiei entered the room, she felt anger and frustrated at him for suddenly showing up without forewarning, but hearing him speak and being himself, all of that was thrown out the door, out the window. All that was left was the longing for him and her long growing affections for him. Even today, the love for him was still swaying in her heart and it shouldn't surprise Botan at all. She's known Hiei for more than a decade now and all that time built up her growing care and affection for the fire demon and three years of not seeing him couldn't deter her affections for him, even though it hurt _a lot_. Botan knew she was damned the moment she realized that she still loved the demon, but couldn't care less, she was missing him and felt like crying for him again. She wanted to touch him, just to reassure herself that it was really him that she saw, not some silly hallucination. Suddenly, she felt uneasy about her desperate feelings and her heart clenched once again, making Botan shed a hot tear against her burning, brimming tears in her eyes.

She hasn't cried in a long time, she realized. _If a year was considered a long time._

Botan pulled out the logbook that Koenma had given her just now and surveyed through it, finding names of the people of different nationalities from the Living World. They all had their scheduled time of death written down and the exact places where they would die. Botan knew all of these locations. She knew almost every location on the Living World by now. The woman skipped back to the first page and found some people written down to die that same day. _Might as well, hop onto it, _Botan thought, sitting up from her bed. _One's gonna die in twenty minutes._

* * *

_I was inspired with Aimer and Abe Mao's song "for LONELY", please listen to it if you could and support these amazing artists._

_I've been wanting to try and write something Yu Yu Hakusho related and after reading numerous works that I had come to adore, I couldn't help myself but go for it. I do hope you like it so far. __Hiei and Botan have been my ship ever since I first watched the series years ago, back to my 7th Grade years for reasons that I can't seem to remember and seeing it flourishing through the tough crowd inspired me to contribute a little piece._

_This will go on for maybe 3 or 4 chapters? I originally planned a one-shot, but it seems like it won't happen. I got a little bit carried away._

_Reviews are appreciated. Thank you._

_Sincerely,_

_ybarra_


End file.
